Beijing’s Metro Ain’t All That
I wish the Beijing Metro went everywhere the map says it does. All aboard the Bland Express The scene at the front door Yesterday, tired of bicycling around Beijing on the days that I ride in with Jingmei, I decided to take the Metro across town instead. As you can…
Read MoreNuttin Like a Sanlitun Cafe!
I wish more cities had a Sanlutin Sister and brother, chilling Brother going for the headlock Yes, the nose push! The Grand Finale: Hair Pull! With a good yank to win! Beijing’s answer to Moscow’s Arbat, Sanlitun is a small street with cheap designer knock-offs for sale on one side,…
Read MoreYou Try to Suntan in Beijing!
Too many shades of ass-white in Asia if you ask me. In a shirt on a sunny day Jingsong drinks in the shade I’d rather tan in Thailand. Today, in one of the rare, smog-free days of a Beijing spring, I am outside and semi-nude. No, its not an attempt…
Read MoreWith Pliers and a Foot on My Forehead
I love foreigner privileges in China, especially in healthcare. He no like hospital too Not today, Mr. Candyman Too much ice cream & fruit At least my smile is still there There I was, lying naked in bed as I stared at the ceiling lost in thought. It was morning…
Read MoreHe Needs Meat
I want a T-bone steak, and make it rare! No more rat meat on a stick! Mongolians ate horses too! I’m not happy with noodles! Once upon a time, long, long ago, in land far, far away, there was a vegetarian. A man who refrained from all meat, poultry, pork,…
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