Bye Bye Wingman
We were the mac-daddy mojo duo
I had a friend, Matt P we’ll call him, who was a treasure for me to find right after Jingmei and I separated. Fresh from his own divorce, we quickly bonded with all the heartbreak and freedom that such a tragedy presents a guy.
We bonded over kickball, beers, and guys’ nights out. I bonded with Matt P like very few other guys in my life. Hell, maybe like no other, for while we were very similar in situations, we were very divergent in tastes.
In the same bar, looking at the same women, we had completely different tastes. Luckier still, women who liked him, passed me by, and those that talked to me, gave him a passing glance.
Then we would throw down for each other. I can’t count the number of time I pulled a hottie out of a cab, with a line and a smile, for Matt P to chat up. Or the times Matt P entertained the annoying friends of the beauties I worked my mojo on. All in all, we were an unstoppable duo.
Well that was until June. That’s when my calls and emails started to go unanswered. It was gradual at first, but then I realized a month had passed and he only wrote thrice, and only then when I went Jewish Mom on him with ‘So, you don’t love me no more?’ voicemails.
By mid-July, I was fed up. The silence was so deafening that I wrote the ‘What the f#@k?!’ email. The one where I poured my heart out about how he was hurting me with his indifference to our friendship, how I wondered if I’d done something wrong, in essence, why he didn’t wanna talk with me anymore.
Do you know what I got back? It was so classic! I got the ‘Problem? What problem? You’re being way too needy!’ email. Yes, guys give it to other guys just like they give it to girls, and he gave it to me like I was some random Betty.
So I was adult about it. I took Matt P off my email list, and outta my cell phone, erasing him from my life. If he wants back in, he knows how to reach me. And one day I wish he still would.
Until then, here’s to the wingman, and may I find another.