My wedding day really started the night before, where by midnight, I was
working my way through the list of tasks assigned to me by my cousin Sean
and friend Kevin, both investment bankers in Singapore and London,
Full of their usual surprises, I was only just able to veto the bondage
babes that Kevin was a little too keen to employ for our evening in
London. Unfortunately, there was no way I could get out of Sean’s ring
& strap bondage gear he brought all the way from Sydney’s ‘Tool
Shed’ just for the occasion.
I’m not gonna admit to anything here, but lets just say it was a damn
good night, that somehow became day way too fast. So fast that I only
stopped drinking when daylight came and I had to catch the train to
Oxford. Boy was that a long and cold ride too!
Apparently, the English don’t know about modern heating methods,
preferring sunlight and spring to heat homes, leaving their rail
passengers to freeze on cold Saturday mornings.
When I finally stumbled back to Jingmei’s, she was in full wedding-prep
mode working her makeup cache for just the right look. Jingmei wore a pale
purple top and a beautiful purplely-grey dress with matching shoes, while
I went with the traditional black suit and funky Picasso tie. I tired to
sleep a little sobriety into myself while we waited for Sean, Kevin, and
the taxi to arrive. Then we were off!
At the registrar’s office, I stood outside in the cold air, gaining
strength from the crisp morning while I kept an eye out for our guests.
Slowly our very varied witnesses made their way into the wedding room,
creating a mini-UN with our twelve guests representing Australia, America,
China, England, Japan, Russia, Singapore, and South Africa.
Jingmei and I really wanted our parents to be at the wedding too, but
visas and airfares are not simple matters when families are on either end
of the globe and weddings are not planned years in advance. Both our
parents made us promise there will be more weddings in the future, in
their respective countries as soon as we can afford to fly around the
world to do it.
The ceremony was pretty intense for all of us, with the intimate
gathering accentuating the very public declaration that Jingmei and I were
making. Yes, we both said, ‘I do,’ though that wasn’t where this
whole day really hit home.
It was when we put rings on each other and recited the full ‘I
take thee to be my lawfully wedded husband/wife.’ That’s when I
realized just how amazing the wedding ceremony is, for the guests as well
as the participants.
Once we finished speaking, it was time for the signing. Jingmei and I
signed the wedding certificate, with my cousin signing as my witness and
Jingmei’s Japanese classmate signing as hers. Funny enough, both guys’
writing was so squiggly that each had to print their name also.
Next, we had to run the bubble gauntlet. Sean’s idea to use bubble
instead of rice was cool when he thought of it in warm Singapore, but a
whole different idea on a cold January morning! Jingmei and I ran for our
lives, barely escaping without icicles forming from all the soapy mix
exploding around us.
As we made our dash, a crowd formed to watch the
turned out to be the next wedding party and all Chinese! Seeing them
looking at us in shock, I was glad I married the wild woman I
We then lead the mass sprint to the reception at a local Chinese
restaurant. We chose this restaurant in an odd way, by following the
recommendation of our waiter at the first Chinese restaurant we went to!
So, the next time you’re in Oxford, skip the Opium Den in favor of the
The food did turn out to be delicious, with Jingmei’s choices pleasing
everyone. Everyone but me that is, since I was so hungover from the night
before I couldn’t eat much past a few nibbles of Peking Duck. As we
munched along, the highlight of the reception arrived: the cake.
Now I know it was a bit much to spend 100 GBP on a cake, but I felt I
had to for a very simple reason. Heart-shaped cakes played a fun role in
our courtship and I felt that we needed one to complete our wedding.
It turned out to be money well spent. The icing was so think and he
well arranged that Jingmei thought it was a box with the cake inside. Only
when we cut into the cake did she fully understand it was edible.
And eat it we did, though this time without the cake fights that
followed our other cake consumption experiences. It turned out to be a
delicious fruitcake with wonderful marzipan frosting topped by a cut
flower arrangement that matched Jingmei’s dress and bouquet.
Speaking of bouquets, it was time for Jingmei to toss hers, so all the
ladies in attendance (what, you think I would hang with married women?)
formed a competitive group while their respective boyfriends tried
desperately to hold them back.
Jingmei turned around, tossed, and watched with laughter as Elena dove
out and snagged the bouquet with both hands. To applause, she smiled and
bowed, but did not relax her iron-fisted grip on those flowers.
With all the traditional ceremonies finished, all the guests full, and
the bride and groom exhausted, it was time to head home.
Jingmei and I had a great night, well after a nap first, and now we’re
living in our marital bliss. Thanks to all our wonderful guests for making such
a great day in our lives, and thank you my loyal reader for enjoying this
day again as you read this.
the Artiste formerly known as Stud Cuz (tAfkaSC)
This part of the web page should be read with an Aussie (No Seppo, say that like it has two Zed’s) accent, as I’m Wayan’s Australian cousin, Sean.
When I was nearly 3, he taught me how to pee my name in the snow, “look Ma, no hands!” He used to be the coolest guy I knew. Yesterday I gave him a pair of old mans slippers to keep him warm & comfortable as he prepares for the life of a happily married man. Stud Cuz is no longer, now he’s the Artiste formerly known as Stud Cuz (tAfkaSC).
As we were walking down the street to the reception, and I was on the phone to Wayan’s parents explaining to them they now had a married son, it struck me that it was certainly a very unusual day.
Over the past few years of watching Wayan’s exploits in Florida 1998 and Australia 2000 it seemed that the swingingest single man I knew was about to settle down. After taking lessons in extroversion and how to go that one step further, from the master himself, I realized where this sort of behaviour could lead you: straight into a life sentence of (blissful?!) wedlock. I will certainly be more careful now about whom I talk to in the bars of Singapore!
As the Artiste formerly known as Stud Cuz prepares to actually settle down, it is amazing to see a whole new side of him come out. The last time I saw him, he was a travel-weary bum in Australia, who thought that hitchhiking from Sydney to Perth via Melbourne was a good idea – clearly he was a mad dog.
Now he thinks that settling down and even getting a job (god forbid!) in Washington DC is a good idea, has anything changed? Well, it has, for he now has a beautiful wife that he adores, (I won’t go into the details, however a particular episode of Seinfeld goes close) he can cook great Chinese, he cleans dishes and clothes, and in general makes Jingmei a happy woman. Scary stuff, I know.
Join me in wishing Wayan & Jingmei all the happiness, success and love they deserve for their lives together and check out the rest of this website from the man himself – tAfkaSC – and his unique views on the world.