Prince Valium

Mmmmm! Never refuse Prince Valiant!

March 2, 1999, Helsinki, Finland

Matt,

Wow, Valium is fun! I’m here in pre-op, with my knee shaved, ass hanging
out of the gown, floating along with Prince Valiant making my mind float
along. Hmmm, kinda feels like I’m stoned, but without the munchies or dry
mouth I am used to. Warm and fuzzy all over, and having fun typing too! Forgive
me if my logic isn’t all there, I’m sure not here!

I remember this movie I saw once, not sure the name, but this girl is telling
someone (friend I think) that Mom is sleeping with Prince Valiant that night,
and in the background, Mom is passed out on the bed. I always wondered what
Valium was like since that scene. Did it make you drowsy, knock you out,
or what? Now I see what is does and I kinda like it. I can see this drug
as a good way to numb the mind and relax the body after a long day in the
CEO slot or being a wife to one.

Yeah, I think I do like this drug. No full bladder or room spinning problems
that comes with booze. No paranoia that comes with pot. Just a fuzziness
on the edges. Only one problem in this situation.

As I will be under the influence of a depressant (that’s what Valium is,
right?), how can I be expected to be of clear mind and body when I am asked
serious questions in the operation, like “do you want us to amputated above
or below the knee?” Or, “Which knee is it again?”

Bummer, I’m in Finland! I would love to do this in the states so I could
crack jokes a mile a minute and have everyone in stitches (get the pun?!),
but none the less, thanks for reading my banter.

I was looking trough the musical collection I brought with me and I was confused
as to what I should listen to all doped up. I’m bumming I didn’t bring Marley.
He would add to this mood so well. Oh, and I’d like to apologize for not
having a grater interest in the techno music you were gonna show me sat night.
I was interested, but just multi-tasking, or as this month’s Wired says,
I was backgrounding you. Rude of me.

Owi! Here is my favorite “Russian” song, the Rasputin song by Boney M! “Ra
Ra Rasputin, Russia’s greatest love machine.”

Matt, do you think we will keep in touch when I go on my travels and you
head back to USA? I sometimes think that our friendship with downgrade a
lot when we spit, and it makes me sad. Do you write? I know you are not the
Hallmark-card-shallow kinda guy, but I’m scared that our correspondence will
disintegrate into a page length email ever so often. Bummer.

The loss of intimacy with people I enjoy is the hardest part of being a wanderer.
It’s not hard for me to make casual friends, but it is hard for me to open
up to anyone as a close friend. I know that we haven’t shared all that much
in the great scheme of secrets and experiences, but I’ve been more honest
and open with you that pretty much anyone else in Moscow. Ok, so Ann and
I bonded more, but I didn’t live with you for a year, and as a woman, we
experienced each other more that you and I would ever want to. Damn, I miss
Ann!

I love the way you are so direct in you manners. I wish I could have such
openness. I love it when you tell me, straight up, that I made you feel slighted
when I didn’t have 100% interest in the CD you wanted to show me.

Thanks.

Oooo, here come the nurses!