My Big MUNI Bitch

The Moscow Metropolitan it ain’t!

On the streets
On the tracks
I am wandering San Francisco on a Jim’s Restaurant Sunday and in need of transportation to the Express for Men in the Stonestown Mall. How can I get there from downtown San Francisco? The MUNI of course!

Ah, but wait, to get on the MUNI you have to buy a single use ticket – $150 – in exact change. Okay, no problem, I’ll just make change… where? The MUNI transit officer tells me to use the BART ticket kiosk to make change. One useless BART ticket later I realize there is a little button on the side that gives change for MUNI.

Now ready to ride, I feed my quarters into the turnstile, circa 1945, and head onto the tracks. There, while trying to figure out where I’m going using the crap maps, I am bombarded by a constant barrage of computer-announced train arrivals and departures, all sounding the same instantly.

Once I finally figure out I want the M Line to Stonestown, two M trains have past. The trains are so short, two cars and maybe 20 feet long, don’t think I’m odd for missing them. Once in a M Line train, I actually like the ride, or well when I’m not wondering where we are. Seems only the major, not all the minor, stops are put on the MUNI maps, which means you have to guestimate when your stop is coming up.

As we left the tunnels and ventured onto streets in the median, it was nice to see cars yield to a train. Still, it wasn’t all that. Me, I’ll take a trolleybus over the MUNI any day.