Chuck Norris’ Beverly Hills Casino

I didn’t know that Chuck Norris liked to gamble in Moscow!

The Beauty of Soviet Planning
Love that subtlety!
Friday night, after a long week of work and jet lag, my
flatmate, Arthur and his boss dragged me outta the house to go gambling.
Now I am not much of a gambling man, I don’t like tossing my money away
in quite the fashion that is customary at a casino, but I couldn’t
resist the chance to see what the Chuck Norris’ Beverly Hills Casino had
to offer.

It is one long room, with eight tables spaced out for the enjoyment
of the twelve gamblers that were there that night. Well, eight
non-working gamblers. There were a number of women, um, on duty, which
were gambling also. Into the mix of hard core New Russians and working
girls, I jumped with my Blackjack skills. Exactly ten minutes and fifty
dollars later, I called it quits at Blackjack (told ya I wasn’t much of
a betting man), and watched the men play.

While losing another $50 at the Roulette wheel, I watched the dealer
count five million roubles (about $850) in Chuck Norris photo-adorned
chips, which the player promptly piled randomly on the board. He lost it
all, over $8000 during the night I heard, and was laughing the whole
time. I guess when you come from the absolute lack of consumables in the
Soviet era; money is worthless when you have more that you know what to
do with.

Arthur did pretty well overall, making $250 after seven hours, though
he was down a bit in the wee hours of the morning. I’m not sure how the
boss did, but I know he bought me way too many rum and Cokes. I spent
Saturday asleep in the bright sunlight, trying to live through a rough
hangover. I guess I wasn’t over the food poisoning from the week before.